Hi Furends! This is Dori *wavy paws!*

The other day I was shredding an old AARP magazine when I spied an article about how 85% of hoomons are confident they can spot an imposter, but the majority flunk an Imposter IQ quiz. Fwankly, I’m worried.

These hoomons are responsible for keeping us in the luxury of which we are accustomed to. If they get swindled by con artists, they will have less to spend on us.

I consider it my pawblic doody to inform yoo of nefarious ways these fakers are taking advantage of our doddering hoomons, so yoo can be on the look out and stop the fakers before they steal the treats right out of your moufs!

Here are ways AARP says our hoomons are being fooled by fakers. (I’ve shredded the magazine so I’m pawraphrazing here.)

Jury Doody

Official Sounding Faker: “This is Judge Judy Wapner calling from the county courthouse. You’ve missed jury doody. Either pay $300 now, or go to prison.”
Our Doddering Hoomon: “Gosh! I don’t want to go to prison. Here’s my credit card, my Social Security Number and the password to my online bank account.”

Utility Company Scam

Official Sounding Faker: “We have a utility truck parked in your neighborhood, ready to shut off your electricity if you don’t pay the past-due amount on your bill tonight.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Gosh! It’s seven o’clock. It’s supposed to go below freezing tonight! I thought I paid my account, but I trust you. Here’s my credit card, my Social Security Number and the password to my online bank account.”

The Gov’mint Faker

Official Sounding Faker: “I’m calling to notify you of your unclaimed property with our state.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Unclaimed property! Is it from Aunt Margaret’s estate? She just passed away, and all she left me was her collection of Neil Diamond records. I don’t have a record player. Plus I never liked Neil Diamond.”

Official Sounding Faker: “I can release Aunt Margaret’s property to you, if you pay $300. I will also need her Social Security number.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Oh dear! I don’t have her Social Security number.”

Official Sounding Faker: “No problem! I can check it through yours. I will also need your credit card number and bank account password.”

The Ticket Scalper

Official Sounding Faker: “We represent Star Struck Tickets, and you’ve been chosen to get seats for the Ed Sheeran concert for a huge discount, if you act quickly.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Gosh! I’d love to take you up on your offer, but… Who is Ed Sheeran?”

Official Sounding Faker: “Some British singer. I also have Pink tickets.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Does a pink ticket cost less than other colors?”
Official Sounding Faker: “What about Metallica?”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “I’m prone to migraines.”

Official Sounding Faker: “Justin Bieber?”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Will he take his shirt off? I don’t like tattoos.”

Official Sounding Faker: “What about Susan Boyle?”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Oh, does she sing too? I just loved her as Erica Kane on All My Children.”

Official Sounding Faker: “I’m not supposed to do this, but if you act now… You can have two Whitney Houston tickets for the price of one. All I need is your credit card, your Social Security Number and your password to your bank account.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Sold!”

The Bank Faker

Official Sounding Faker: “We have detected a problem with your accounts. We will need you to verify your personal information.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Oh dear. I will hurry right over.”

Official Sounding Faker: “No! We need you to verify over the phone so we can confirm you are you, and fix the error.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Okay. What information do you need?”

Official Sounding Faker: “Your bank account number, starting with the 9-digit routing number. We will also need you to verify your date of birth and driver’s license number.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Do you also need my Social Security Number?”

Official Sounding Faker: “You betcha!”

The Kitten Breeder

Official Sounding Faker: “Our blue ribbon purebred Turkish Van, Hermione, just had a beautiful litter of purebred kittens. They are usually sold for $700 a piece, but for today only, you can have a kitten for $200!”
Our Doddering Hoomon: “Gosh! What a great deal. I’ll take two! Here’s my credit card, my Social Security Number and the password to my online bank account.”

The Lottery Winner Faker

Official Sounding Faker: “I represent the Ontario lottery, and I’m excited to tell you that you’ve won $1 million! All you have to do is pay the import tax and fee, and we’ll send you your winnings.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “This is so exciting! I’ve never won anything. How much is the import tax and fee?”

Official Sounding Faker: “Only $500.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Oh dear. That’s a lot of money.”

Official Sounding Faker: “One million dollars is a lot more money.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “I know, but… I’m supposed to take Frisky for his shots tomorrow. I may not have enough to pay both your fee and his veterinary bill.”

Official Sounding Faker: “Well, you sound like a nice person, so… I’m going to do something I’m not supposed to do. I will change the fee to $300, but only if you ACT NOW. Think of all the treats and toys you could buy Frosty with one million dollars?”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “It’s Frisky, but for one million dollars, I’ll change his name! Here’s my credit card number.”

Official Sounding Faker: “I will also need your date of birth and Social Security Number to verify you are who you say you are. You know how the government is.”

The Police or Fire Department Fakers

Official Sounding Faker: “We’re raising money for local officers/firefighters injured in the line of duty. How much will you be donating today?”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “How can I say no?”

The IRS Faker

Official Sounding Faker: “Our records show you are at grave risk for large fines for unpaid taxes. You must settle this situation immediately to avoid going to jail.”

Our Doddering Hoomon: “Oh dear! Do you take American Express?”

Stranger Danger!

AARP says never listen to a pitch from a stranger, be it on the phone, in person, or over the internet, without first independently verifying they are legitimate. They didn’t indicate in the article exactly how to verify they’re legitimate, so my advice is to tell them that before you commit to anything, especially giving them money, yoo will first need to call their corporate office to verify the offer. And not necessarily a phone number they give yoo, either. Honestly! Do I have to think of everything? Go Google how to avoid getting scammed. Google won't steer you wrong! *coughs into paw*

For me, the best way to never be a victim is to consider whatever they’re selling to be a scam—and walk away with your tail in the air.

So! How vulnerable are your hoomons to official sounding fakers? Have them click on the link below to take the Imposter IQ Quiz to find out.


Pee Ess. My hoomons got 100% right on the quiz, so tonight we’re celebrating with Starkist toona noms.

Before I leave, I want to wish my daddy a very Happy Birthday!

He's not old, just funny in the head.

-quoting my mom

Until Next Time...


  1. There are so many fakers out there. You have to be on the lookout every second. I hope Karma bites them in the you know what.

    Have a purrfect day. My best to your mom. ♥

  2. Yep, those fakers are everywhere, just like a game of wack-a-mole!

  3. It is easy to see how doddering hoomans can get fleeced of all their money. You forgot the Nigerian prince who wants to give you loads of money for a small payment, probably $300.
    Happy birthday to your dad!

  4. Peepers got a call just this past Saturday. Yup, supposed fraudulent charges on her credit card.


    Well let's just say, the faker guy ended up hangin' up on the peep! Yup, WHEN MY PEEP is in a foul mood, EVERYONE knows.


  5. Good for your hoomans, Dori! My mom only got 80%. She missed number 5 and number 8. She thinks every type of scammer that exists has contacted her at one time or another. It is so annoying. She bitches about it all the time. Thankfully our hoomans still have most of their marbles. Excellent and helpful post, Dori. XOCK, angel Lily Olivia, angel Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, angel Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth, Calista Jo, Cooper Murphy, Sawyer & Kizmet

  6. Silly Dad did not know it was illegal to play a foreign lottery. He doesn't play any lotteries so we gave him a pass.
    Funny post and so true. People will bite on any old bs. The only ones we ever get is the call: "This is Apple Tech and your computer has been invaded by..." Yeah we don't have any Apple so bite the worm in yours

  7. I get calls about a company going out of business and refunding my $399 warranty on my computer. My computer didn't even cost that much. 😂
    Happy Birthday to your Dad!!!

  8. It is a crazy human world and get concerned about our fur persons all the time ~ sweet post ~ sad that there scammers everywhere ~

    Thanks for visiting from Flor i da ~ ^_^

    Living moment by moment,

    A ShutterBug Explores,
    aka (A Creative Harbor)

  9. Glad your human is so clever. :)


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