A Severe Case of Do Too Much-itis

 

Hi everyone, it's me, Dori *wavy paws*

Well, it's been another crazy week here at Casa Wonderpurr, the place where I live. The tempurratures here in our small beachside town are already stinking up the place at 90 degrees making my pawrents sweaty and crabby. Not a good combination, I assure yoo.

This month we have been in this house two years. Yes, time is flying like hungry owls circling our Catio. Daddy continues to find stuff to repair, and Momma continues to be extremely vocal about how this house is like living in a shoe box.

Yesterday Daddy found a screw in the tire to Momma's car. Of course all four tires now need to be replaced as the car is at a certain age where stuff happens. The inside also stinks like an angry cat. However as there have been no angry cats inside the car, it's anybody's guess as to how that smell is purrmeating the inside. Mom thinks maybe a stray cat sprayed under the hood cuz that's where Daddy tucks a bag of stinky mothballs to discourage Sassy Squirrel from hiding his nut stash. He did that during the winter and also chewed the insulation around the engine.

Continuing the topic of raising blood pressure, Momma has finally thrown enough hissy fits over a ridiculously tiny kitchen sink that Daddy has called in pawfessionals to see about getting something larger. Specifically a sink without a divider. This sink is the size of something you'd find in a Winnebago. Incredibly, Mom's friend Donna who visited us and lives in a Winnebago said her sink might be larger. Stay tuned because you just know this is not going to be an easy fix because a larger sink might require a cut to the counter marble. Nothing is ever easy around this place.

Do yoo watch Yellowstone? If so, remember how the character Walker refers to the Yellowstone ranch i.e. "This ... effing... place." My pawrents have started to refer to our house as the Yellowstone of Florida.

So while my pawrents are fweaking out over hoomon stuff, me and my fursibs have been enjoying the Catio. Mostly in the morning before a certain AssWabbit is released from his ZenDen, and again in the evening after he is tucked away for the night.

This arrangement is the end result of him refusing to leave a certain petite 'n pretty tabby alone. The last time I saw him he chased me like he thought I was PREY and scared me so badly... I ... I pooped! That was it. He is purrmanently in the dog house.

So even though I hoomiliated myself, something good came out of it. Like they say, poop happens, and when it does around this house, Momma steps into action and Hekk will be paid to the one who caused the trouble.

As yoo can see by the look in his eyes, Wabbit is truly possessed. He is now posting #SurrealSunday photos on his Instagwam. I just don't understand why he is so poopular on Instagwam and I am not. I'm a nice girl. I guess hoomons enjoy bad boys and boy, does Wabbit fit that bill. Although this past week was so hot, there was a moment when everyone felt really bad for him.

Daddy was off playing hit balls with sticks, and Momma went hunting for noms at Target. When she got home she let Wabbit out into the Catio to run off some of his endless energy. Daddy arrived home about fifteen minutes later. He saw Wabbit jumping frantically at the door, and let him in.

Wabbit immediately threw himself on the cool tile, panting. Now Wabbit pants whenever he overexerts himself. He's been doing this since he was a 3 month old kitten. Therefore playtime is limited to wearing him down, not wearing him out. Seeing him pant -- and truly he looked like he might pass out -- Mom gave him a cookie tray filled with ice. Of course he was all over that, pawing the cubes out of the tray onto the floor, creating puddles that would make the tile slick enough for a certain hoomom with bad feet slip and fall and break her body. He's such an AssWabbit! But he did cool down. Suffice to say, during the summer no one will be allowed outside from noon to three when the humidity and sun are at their worst.

In other news, there has been a lot of barf coming out of Jesse the Toothless Wonder. The other day he barfed both his breakfast and his dinner, making Mom wonder if he was sick. Turns out when he barfed the next day Mom saw undigested cat kibble. As she does not feed him kibble with his breakfast and dinner, she realized Daddy has been giving Jesse in between meal snacks. 

The problem is, Jesse cannot chew. He swallows whole. And the whole kibbles sit in his tummy and expand like a sponge when he drinks water. So when he is fed his normal meals, it's sitting on top of his already full tummy and ... voila! I believe that's French for Here Comes The Barf.

Don't worry, the problem is solved. Momma wrote a note telling Daddy not to feed us kittehs anymore, and taped it to the lid of the kibble container. She also threatened to make Daddy clean up the barf.

With Summertime arriving later this month, and the heat already here, Mom called a meeting with me and Wabbit - he was on Zoom in his ZenDen - to discuss the amount of social media activities we have put on her calendar. Sadly, she says she cannot accept any more activities, and has threatened to join the Great Resignation sweeping this country.

Momma is working with Wabbit on publishing his memoirs, Diary of an AssRabbit.

She's also coordinating the 2nd Annual Golden AssRabbit Awards. Please check his Rabbit.TurkishVanCat Instagwam and also the new Golden.AssRabbit.Awards Instagram accounts for details. The entire contest will be run on Instagram this year because last year was overwhelming  by running it off both Instagram and Facebook and our blog.

She also has Wabbit's annual birthday pool pawty to coordinate for August. He turns 5 this year. So, yes, Wabbit is hogging Momma's time, and sadly, this leaves me with nothing to do but lie around during appropriate Catio time, working on my tan lines.

As I understand it, Momma has been chatting behind our backs with Miz Nikki of Cat Lady Academy who is also momanager to Manny the Halloween Cat, and Nikki has told her she's got a severe case of DoTooMuchitis. When yoo suffer from DoTooMuchitis, yoo do nothing well. And that's exactly how Momma feels. She's throwing content every which way, but none of it is up to her high standards and it's not achieving the desired effect. Plus she's exhausted. Her brain is melty. Pretty sure I saw it running out of her eyes the other day.

In order to recharge her batteries, Momma is taking a 30 day hiatus from blogging, from Twitter and from interacting on Facebook. She assured me she will help me visit the blogs of my friends to see what yoo are up to, but we will not be posting here for the rest of June. And possibly we may continue this hiatus throughout the summer, with me popping in maybe once a month to report on what's going on Behind the Scenes.

I will miss writing my Tuesdays with Dori report, but like Miz Nikki says... Cutting back is OKAY and will contribute to your success.

Until next month...


12 comments:

Gidget Blue Sky said...

oh mi cod, mum hatez da split sink, she broked her fav ceramic salad bowl washing it in dat sink. she replaced it when she re-did the counter tops, den she hadz to replace da salad bowl, she wuz bummed. we will miss yor posting. we check yor instas daily eben tho we are not insta-ed

Eastside Cats said...

Oh, Dori!
Here in Michigan, the temps go up, then down, then up, then down!
Some of my cold-weather clothes are still in the closet, 'cause one doesn't know what the day will bring.
Hope things settle down at your place.

Wendy said...

I'll miss you Dori, but mum's gotta have a breather some time! See you soon, baby!

Sandee said...

I had to laugh about that sink. We have a boat so I know about small sinks. It's what it is. We had a double sink, but it was large, now we have a large single sink. Much better.

Have a fabulous blogging break. We all need a break now and then. Scritches all around. ♥

Kitties Blue said...

Well, Dori, my mom says she totally understands. When she has too much to do, However, she tends to do nothing. She says she has absolutely little interest in doing anything. She says your mom stays so busy creating content, and we enjoy all of it and are appreciative. You know we will be checking on you on Instagram and that darn @$$R as well. My mom sends big hugs to yours. XOCK, angel Lily Olivia, angel Mauricio, Misty May, angel Giulietta, angel Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth, Calista Jo, Cooper Murphy, Sawyer & Kizmet 😘💓

catladymac said...

Oh Dori - everyone needs a break from - whatever they are doing. The trouble with doing nothing, though, is t hat it is an endless job. Purrs !

Brian said...

Hey Dori, WOW, you all are really busy and we're sure gonna miss seeing your posts but we do understand. Help your Mom get things all caught up!

The J-Cats said...

Oh, Dori - just READING about having so much to do makes us feel completely EXHAUSTICATED!
Enjoy your rest (well, your Hoomin's rest) and paws together that Ass-Wabbit will also rest for a bit (is such a thing pawsible?).
Enjoy the summer. It's furry hot here, too - but at least in Jerusalem, it's not humid and there is usually a cool breeze at night.

Memories of Eric and Flynn said...

Your mom is so busy that she needs a good break. I will miss you but will see you when you come back.

Basil and The B Team ~ BionicBasil ® said...

Oh no, there's nothing wurse than sweaty, crabby pawrents, purrhaps suggest a dip in the pool to cool things down a little! MOL

Gidget Blue Sky said...

oh mi cod!!! a mew sink!!!! woohoo!!!!

Momma Kat and Her Bear Cat said...

With your comment about pooping, I totally misread this sentence snippet at the end, "with me popping in maybe once a month to report on what's going on Behind the Scenes."

Pooping once a month is really bad.