Dear Monday - You Are Hereby Cancelled

Dear Monday: You are hereby given notice to leave the premises immediately and not return. 

So far you are being blamed for Daddy stepping in a Gidget-gross hairball first step out of bed. 


You are also to blame for crows tearing apart the trash bags on the curb shortly after my Dadders put them out.


You made Momma spill 95% of her breakfast shake, making a mess of epic proportions. Plus she had used the last of her strawberries and was devastated. 


Also, the gooey drink dripped over the counter into the drawers, as well as soaked her shoes and shorts. Not a good look, I assure you. 


You are responsible for Dadders leaving late to play hit ball with sticks game because you hid his phone. 

You are also to blame for the inedible lumps in his Cream of Wheat. 

Monday, you made Mom struggle to put Opie in a box for his blood work vet visit this morning, and made sure copious amounts of his baby-fine hair smeared her already disgusting shorts. 


You also made her online bank ping her phone while waiting for Opie's test results. This totally freaked her out because she knew Dadders was not home using the online account. So she had to drive like a bat out of hell 20 minutes back home with Opie in the back of the van sliding back and forth in his carrier until she could get home to change the accounts passwords.


You then made the doorbell ring, freaking every last one of us fur kids out. The stranger at the door was a water irrigation inspector who wanted access to the garage to check the equipment. Except Chevy and Nik live in the garage. So Mom had to put them both in her office.

Not an easy task because Nik had to be dragged like an old snail out of his cat house shell, and then after Mom realized she doesn't know where the key is to the irrigation box and told the stranger to come back, she then had to drag Nik out from under her desk, risking blood poisoning should he bite her because he was extremely stressed.


And finally Monday... FINALLY... I hold you personally responsible for my momanager’s stress, which has resulted in her posting late on my social media accounts. 


For that alone I will never forgive you. 


This is an autographed photo of me not forgiving you. Note how upset I appear. This is not an normal look for me, and I may never recover.



You here hereby cancelled Monday. Do you understand? CANCELLED!


Sincerely, Hermès R. Koz aka Rabbit


Pee Ess: You will be hearing from PretzelKitteh, my littergator. If I were you, Monday, I'd be afraid. I'd be very afraid.




12 comments:

Sandee said...

Not a good Monday at all. Someone needs to take Monday to task. You're a cutie pie though.

I hope your peeps have a better day tomorrow.

Have a purrfect day and week. My best to your peeps. ♥

The Florida Furkids said...

Yikes...not a good start to the week.

Eastside Cats said...

Now that Monday is officially banished, kitties...you may want to burn some sage to clear out the negative vibes that it brought!
Hope the rest of the week goes much, MUCH smoother, for all concerned.

Sandee said...

Thank you for joining the Awww Mondays Blog Hop.

Have a fabulous Awww Monday and week. ♥

pilch92 said...

And I thought I had a bad day- your mom wins that contest.

Rabbit said...

Excellent idea, Eastside Kitties. Mom has some sage in the sound. Wonder if adding a little oregano and rosemary will hasten the cleansing. Purrs, Rabbit

Memories of Eric and Flynn said...

Wow! Monday has a lot to answer to and thoroughly deserves to be cancelled.

Brian said...

Dang, Monday had been downright rude lately!

The J-Cats said...

We don't usually approve of "Cancel Culture" (mol) but in this purr-ticular case, the Cancellation of Monday seems absolutely justified. And to help you kitties get over the Trauma, why not join Us at our Independence Day BBQ up in the Enchanted Forest on Fursday? We would be so happy to see you all.

Pam and Teddy said...

I have no problem at all cancelling Mondays.....I think they stress everyone out - even old retired people like my parents. I do think that your Mom and your Dad had more than enough to want to cancel Monday though - I mean there's only so much "STUFF" humans can handle!

Hugs, Teddy

edie said...

Wow! What a Monday! It's all pretty bad.

Kitties Blue said...

Sounds as if y'all should have stayed in bed or gone back to bed when things started to go sideways. Our mom and dad never know what day of the week it is, so things get crazy here most days. We love your current header! Purrfect for summer. Our mom sends kisses to Dori. Happy everything went well for Opie. XOCK, angel Lily Olivia, angel Mauricio, Misty May, angel Giulietta, angel Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth, Calista Jo, Cooper Murphy, Sawyer & Kizmet, angel Lily Olivia, angel Mauricio, Misty May, angel Giulietta, angel Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth, Calista Jo, Cooper Murphy, Sawyer & Kizmet