Meow! Meow! Meow! We Want Our Kibble Back Now!

 



DORI: Hi evfurry buddy, this is Dori. *half-hearted wavy paws.* I usually welcome yoo to Kick the Litter with a perky little paragraph about how we like to mix hoomor with intelligent debate over Hot Topics that pertain to us cats, but fwankly there’s nuthin’ hoomorous about today’s Hot Topic and I’m too upset to do anything more than growl.


Drastic Change In Diet is Cause for Rebellion

OPIE: We’re all upset because our mom has gotten some insane notion that kibble is causing problems and we need to take a huge step back from eating it. That's Boo-Sheet!


DORI: It’s because of yoo, KC. Yoo are to blame!

KC: What? I didn’t do nuthin’.

DORI: Yoo most certainly did, mister! Yoo turned into a voracious kibbie junkie, pestering our momma until she felt the need to Gogle why yoo are so hungry even after nomming yoor meals.

FRANK: Beware the Gogle. It gives our moms too much information resulting in drastic changes, like removing kibble from our bowls.

GIDGET: She broke my heart when she served my breakfast this weekend and there was not a single kibble on my plate. She knows I love kibbles. In fact, over the past month I’ve been eating all the kibbles and leaving the chicken pate for Dori to eat who then barfs all over the rug because her tummy is too full.

DORI: That’s a lie! I barf because I can smell yoor bref, Miss Halitosis 2023.

GIDGET: My bref is sweeter than yoors, Miss Piggie.

FRANK: KC, I overheard Mom telling Dad that you've become almost frantic for kibble throughout the day. She increased your portion of wet food but says you're still hungry. That’s when she read that dry food is extremely calorie-dense. Even the high-protein kind she's paying a lot of money for. It has no water in it to contribute volume to the food. Because of this, feeding just dry food means cats will be hungrier if getting an adequate number of calories in the food because of the smaller volume given. We get both canned and dry, but clearly, KC, you prefer the kibble over the canned.

KC: In my defense Candy told me that hoomons noms are not good for me. She made me sign a document preventing me from eating hoomons food.

GIDGET: What the Friskies does that have to do with demanding so much kibble?

KC: Nuthin. I just thought I’d throw it into the boiling pot.

FRANK: Human food isn’t all that good for cats, but Mom has been offering us boiled chicken.

KC: Not touching it. Candy says if humans eat it, then it’s human food.

FRANK: Yeah, I ate it once, but I'm done. Now if she served fresh lizards caught from our catio, I might agree to eat that.

DORI: Momma also read that us kitties are pwetty good at reading the room and will twain their hoomons. An example that hits close to our home is someone racing for the kitchen every time Momma walks in that direction, tripping her repeatedly and meowing until she caves and feeds the tabby known as Kevin Coopurr his fweakin' kibbies.

KC: Pretty sure the article didn’t call meowt by name.

DORI: Pwetty sure it did.

OPIE: I am more upset than the rest of you. Dr. Feelgood says I’ve got kidney disease and Mom is feeding me ChauncieMarie’s food. I don’t like it. I want my chicken pate and my beef pate. But Mom says cats with kidney problems need less protein. This is a cause for me to spray something!


FRANK: Is anyone else getting some weird paste tucked under their pate? I refused to eat it.

KC: It’s steel cut oatmeal. Another crazy idea Momma has to get us fuller. I won’t eat it either.

DORI: Bwace yoorself. She made a pot of bawley this morning. Pwetty sure we will be seeing it hiding under our pate tonight at dinner.

GIDGET: Purrsonally I kinda enjoyed the chicken noms she passed out at lunch. Maybe I was just hungry, but she offered me a choice of white meat and dark meat. I ate them both.

DORI: Twaitor.

GIDGET: You’re just hissed off because Momma loves me more than you.

FRANK: <grabs Dori by the tail to stop her from attacking> You know, we might be overreacting.

OPIE: What do you mean?

FRANK: Remember back when Mom thought we needed to give up Fancy Feast for some other high-priced brands? She tried her best to get us used to the new stuff but eventually gave up and we got our Fancy Feast back.

DORI: I’m sure it had to do with us barfing despite her mixing in the new with the old food. I told yoo group pawtissypashun would pay off.

GIDGET: I know she’s doing her best to keep us healthy. The problem is there are thirteen of us. If some of yoo <looks directly at Dori> would volunteer to leave, some of us who are Momma’s favorites could enjoy a higher-priced brand of cat noms.

FRANK: <quickly pins Dori to the floor> Simmer down, Dor. She’s just pulling your tail.

KC: You know Elly and Peaches went to see Dr. Feelgood last week. They both have a mouth problem where a tooth gets absorbed back into the gums. Mom told Dad it’s painful until the tooth disappears, and the gums heal. I bet that’s what triggered her crazy need to remove kibble from the menu.

OPIE: I feel sorry for her. She’s doing her best. Maybe we should just … just eat the chicken and barley and oatmeal. Make her happy.

KC: I just can’t do that, brother. I signed Candy’s document. I’m a kibble-eating cat and there’s nothing that’s gonna change my mind.

FRANK: I bet starving would change your mind.

KC: What? No! Mom won’t let me go hungry. She’ll cave.

OPIE: So far, she’s not caved on me getting my Fancy Feast back. It’s been a month.

KC: A month?

OPIE: At least. Prescription food is bleh but at least my tummy feels full.

DORI: Maybe Fwank is right. This might be a new kick Momma is on and pwetty soon she’ll be giving us our kibbies back.

FRANK: Why don’t we meet again in two weeks to compare notes? In the meantime, stand your ground. No nomming oatmeal or barley, or anything that doesn’t smell like typical cat food hiding under our pate.


OPIE: Thanks, evfurryone for joining us today on Kick the Litter. Let us know in the comments your opinions or experience with your hoomons changing your diet and whether they gave in to return the old food.

GIDGET: If you’ve enjoyed today’s show, I invite you to share it with those who may also enjoy our panel discussions. And please consider adding your email to our list – located on the sidebar – so you don’t miss any upcoming episodes of Kick the Litter.

DORI: Thank yoo evfurrybuddy for joining us today. 

Until Next Time…



11 comments:

  1. Hi ev-fur body, I lived in the orphanage fur a while, and I just know they fed me gruel. Lynn feeds me crunchie chicken. We, she, tried me with wet and dry mix and had to clean my bee-hind too many times. Guess it just was not meant fur me. I luv my chickie and I am saddened to hear you are being horribly deprived of good noms. What loving momma would go to the trouble to cook fresh chickie fur their fur babies? I am a pudgy girl, but that's life in the cat world here. Precious

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  2. Flynn loved wet food but Eric preferred kibble. I tried to transition Eric to soft food to try and lose a bit of weight, but he looked so sad that I caved in. I gave him half portions and also the other half wet food. He would eventually eat the soft food but under protest.

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  3. haz your mum tried putting water on dee kibble? i gitz some kibble in my bowl. den fur lunch i git a little wet foodz and a few dry treetz during the day. i drink water between cuz it iz hot where we live. i eat nutro dry and wet. i usually do not finish either my wet or dry and it gits frown away. i do not eat humon foodz hardly eber, maybe a taste here and there. dee mum duz not eat anything interesting usually, except maybe poppy corn or cheese. and dee mum will have a hot dog maybe once or twice a year cuz dat iz wat yoo do in dee summer.

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  4. WOW, no kibble?!?! We still have kibble, our Dad shopped hard to find us something we're not overly fond of so we end up not eating much of it...but we still have it MOL!

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  5. Opie, I am sorry you have kidney disease. There are several brands that make food for CKD so maybe you will find one you do like.

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  6. Oh, kitties, that sounds horrible. We're very sorry that your momma has switched your food, but we do know it's because she loves you so mcuh, and is doing her very best to keep you healthy. We can imagine it is quite challenging with 13 of you. Sending purrs and love to you all!

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  7. We get a very varied diet with lots of different wet foods and a mix of kibbles. Tama is more of a wet food girl whereas the boys eat more kibble, but everyone does eat everything.

    Purrs,
    The Chans

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    1. We have a varied diet too. My momma is just being a poo-poo head.

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  8. My mom says kibble is bad for kitties too. What do humans know??? ~Ernie

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    1. Oh Ernie, the wurld is turning crazy. Come join our picket line. I'll even make yoo a pawtest sign. Love, Dori

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  9. Well...we can relate. We all eat prescription kibble, but our mom won't put any in the bowls until we have eaten our canned noms. And some of us are not very cooperative. Plus, we think it is totally unfair that Mom has switched Sawyer to kitten pate. He almost always cleans his plate now, so that means he's getting his meds, but we all want kitten pate. Then there is Hoover (aka Audrey). She is turning into a butterball, as she is right there to clean up everybody's meals and treats if they don't eat fast enough. It's a challenge when their are so many kitties in residence, and there are only nine of us. We hope your kibble situation gets straightened out. XOCK, angel Lily Olivia, angel Mauricio, Misty May, angel Giulietta, angel Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth, Calista Jo, Cooper Murphy, Sawyer, Kizmet, Audrey & Raleigh p.s. Mom says this Noom thing she is doing is all about calorie dense foods. She's eating too many of those, but she has lost 13 pounds. How is your mom doing with her fasting?

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